Are you sitting quietly class? Then we shall begin. First, it takes at least two people weighing at least 11 stone to tip over the acerage cow. You need to push the cow at the top of its side and quite quickly to get it to tip over.
The second problem is that cows don´t sleep on their feet, they only doze. This means you have to be quiet when you sneak up on it.
Also, be ready to run. I´d be pissed off if a load of drunken student pushed me over while I was having a quick kip.
That´s enough of this drivel, I´m off to the pub.
Ever tried Cow Taping?
Cow Taping is accomplished by sneeking up on unsuspecting cows and covering them in duct tape.
Not only will this protect the cow from the ravages of foul weather and
the relentless attack of nasty, dirty, icky flies;
but also, the cow will instantly become the envy of all of the other cows in the pasture
because of her shiny new coat.